Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

Trust me, I write fiction.

Save the contrition for the confessional. Regret isn't worth a damn to anyone.

Segui il tuo corso et lascia dir les genti. (Follow your road and let the people say).

Faire is not faire, but that which pleaseth.

Life is a great experience. Dignity is a treasure.

Sin carries in it its own misery.

I was about 13, in some ways, when I wrote the first book. Approximately 18 when I wrote the second.

Occasions are rare; and those, who know how to seize upon them, are rarer.

You ask my advice about acting? Speak clearly, don't bump into the furniture and if you must have motivation, think of your pay packet on Friday.

The past is what we have to learn about how to direct America to the future.