Remember - that which does not kill us can only make us stronger. And that which does kill us leaves us dead!

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

Things don't just happen the way they happen for your its own Creator, Mentor and Destroyer

What you love is your own love. It's not love, it's selfishness. It's not me you think of, but what you feel about me.

People don't just live one life. They keep coming back until they get it right.

My mom has always just been one of those people who handle adversity and challenges, and really everything, with so much grace and elegance. I saw it all the time.

It seems like every time I start to feel good, something really awful happens. It's like... it's really terrible.

Someone knocks at the door of an apartment to borrow salt or sugar, people run into each other in the elevator, and in this way become inscribed in the spectator's memory.

Science advances one funeral at a time.

Slave holding is very unusual among the English-speaking peoples. Canadians didn't do it. Australians didn't do it. The Democratic Party and the states they controlled did it!

What I would say about me is: What you see is what I get.