Remember this, folks - I am a Hillbilly, and I don't always Bet the same way I talk. Good advice is one thing, but smart gambling is quite another.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

Hope rises and dreams flicker and die. Love plans for tomorrow and loneliness thinks of yesterday. Life is beautiful and living is pain.

The things I call crisis and all the things that were coming after me are all coming to serve the purpose of God in my life.

Everything that happens in our lives has meaning even though we may not understand it or even pay attention to it.

Sprinkled in with the beauty and joy of life will be storms. These storms will require you to anchor yourself to your faith until your rainbow arrives.

Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves.

My strangest auditioning experience was when I was reading for a TV show, and right when I started the audition, the casting director left the room and yelled at me from the hallway to keep reading.

If we fail to act, we will end up with a different planet.

Ninety percent of the success of any product or service is its promotion and marketing.

When you are faced with choices, you can achieve your dreams without sacrificing your integrity.

I know if you talk faster and use more ten-dollar words than everyone around you, you convince half of them that they should shut up because you know what you're talking about.

Don't measure the height of your Christmas tree. Measure the abundance of the love present in your heart! Have a Blessed Christmas!