Remember though, your best weapon is between your ears and under your scalp -provided it's loaded.

If a grasshopper tries to fight a lawnmower, one may admire his courage but not his judgement.

Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic.

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

I never learned from a man who agreed with me.

A generation which ignores history has no past — and no future.

Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events.

May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so.

In today's life, Luxury is Time and Space.

My growth as a human being has been directly proportional to my growth as a marital artist.

The past was dwindling, like something shrinking to a speck in the rear-view mirror, and the future was shining through the windscreen, demanding her full attention.

When the Fox hears the Rabbit scream he comes a-runnin', but not to help.

You can't have good ideas unless you have lots of ideas.

What renders us so changeable in our friendship is, that it is difficult to know the qualities of the soul, but easy to know those of the mind.

My aesthetic is that of the sniper on the roof.

Maybe television causes cancer, Garp thinks; but his real irritation is a writer's irritation: he knows that wherever the TV glows, there sits someone who isn't reading.

No human investigation can be called real science if it cannot be demonstrated mathematically.

Unfortunately, the greater the humanitarian outreach, the greater the violence required to achieve it.