Republicans have nothing but bad ideas and Democrats have no ideas.

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'

Elected officials shouldn’t get to choose who gets to choose elected officials.

If a group of people - leaders - can convince a group of folk who barely have a pot to piss in that the rich shouldn't be taxed-- THAT is leadership!

When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out.

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.

David Foster Wallace: Because I'd like to be the sort of person who can enjoy things at the time instead of having to go back in my head and enjoy them then.

To me, mathematics, computer science, and the arts are insanely related. They're all creative expressions.

Writing is a solitary activity, it requires isolation and silence.

We live in an age when there is a false glare on the things of time and a great mist over the things of eternity.

If there is one path above all others to war, it is the path of weakness and disunity.

Especially as an artist who has been signed to one of the majors throughout my last ten years, you don't always get to write your own music.

The attack on unions has been far more extreme here [in U.S], and it has been much more successful.

Out of sight, out of mind. The absent are always in the wrong.

Most of the major mistakes I made in my life, I made when I was too tired to know what I was doing - both personally and professionally.

I've changed my mind, even against Omar al-Bashir. Whether he has to be charged or not, the Sudanese shall decide or the Africans.