Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

Trails are used by God to teach you humility and dependence on His grace rather than your own strength.

Poets are Damned... but See with the Eyes of Angels.

Sympathy is charming, but it does not make up for pain.

That's what we're here on this Earth for, to help others.

I'm really getting better at guitar. I'm not trapped behind a piano. You can get out and move with a guitar and still direct the band.

I come from a long line of saloon keepers and proselytizers, and I draw from both sides.

I think even Republicans are saying [Andrew] Puzder may have a problem.

Long Gone is the type of book that should come with a warning. It’s a compulsively readable, highly addictive story. The ending will leave you breathless.

Do you know that women who are chaste remain much fresher than those who are not?

What capital I give for the spade merely replaces what the manufacturer had already invested in the expectation that the spade would be needed.