Ross Perot. I could have had a ball with him.

Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him.

In Hollywood, it's hard to be funny, because all the big jokes are in Washington.

If I have a rough day, and I'm angry, I'll just go into Kirk Douglas and throw over a table. And when I need to lift my spirits, Kermit can always do the trick.

I'm not really a political satirist. I don't kid myself. I'm more interested in doing the mannerisms and the personality.

Frank Sinatra taught me how to do him. It took me seven years to master him. He would tell me, tap your foot, Rich, and don't forget to grasp your sleeve.

If you become president, you're guaranteed to develop some nervous habit.

I still have your wrist watch but I couldn't hold the time still.

I stopped writing in a way they would understand because it wasn’t for them or even him. It was for I to understand, for I to make sense, and for I to let go of it.

Anything from 1-0 to 2-0 would be a nice result

I am asking all Americans, Republicans, Independents and Democrats, to join us in our campaign to defeat the corrupt establishment and give our government back to the people. It's going to happen.

Today the term "global" can no longer constitute a serious topic for an in-depth intellectual discussion because it simply means "Camerica".

Animals are such agreeable friends - they ask no questions; they pass no criticisms.

I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife).. but still my own.

Nature is not mute, it is a man who is deaf.

The human brain is the god of technological innovation.