STRANGELOVE REPRODUCTION: Having children to make up for the fact that one no longer believes in the future.

Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.

Fondue sets, martini shakers and juicing machines: three things the world could live completely without.

If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure.

Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them.

Eagles are seagulls with a good hairdo.

We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude.

Is there anything in the world more annoyingly creepy than an unspoken dress code?

When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.

Whereas I formerly believed it to be my bounden duty to call other persons to order, I now admit that I need calling to order myself.

I will always be mad at someone. That will never go away.

Once you expose your private life, if you give one little bit, the floodgates are open and everyone's got a free range for you.

You know who was wonderful to work with? Was Paul Gleason, may he rest in peace.

There are some people who eat an orange but don't really eat it. They eat their sorrow, fear, anger, past, and future.

In my opinion, life is more important than show business.

We do not need more laws . No country suffers from a shortage of laws. We need a new model .

My life is very much consumed with work.

The only unnatural sexual behavior is none at all.

I think that clothes should be a shelter like a house or a rug. I think that there is that element of protection and a uniform can be just that.