SYCOPHANT- One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

You can't always be right, but you can be wrong a lot less

The boy took my sketchbook.

I look forward to the day when I can be Republican again. I'm an Alan Simpson Republican.

Indeed the presence of outstanding strengths presupposes that energy needed in other areas has been channeled away from them.

Her lips were drawn to his like a moth to a flame.

A good man's life is all of a piece.

The first time I sang with David Daniels... I had never performed with a countertenor before. That first time was magic, it was so beautiful. And he's such a great artist.

If the body can respond so decisively to music, it must in some sense be music.

For a loser, Vegas is the meanest town on earth.

A liberal will cut off your leg so he can hand you a crutch.