School is a place were you go to eat your lunch

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie.

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

You know you're ugly when you go to the proctologist and he sticks his finger in your mouth.

Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves - slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future.

The love we have can’t die. If you ever think I’m not there, just be still and you’ll feel my presence. I’ll be beating with your heart.

It is wise to buy acquaintances, but foolish to buy friends.

melanin touchesyour eyes like thesun kissed bliss ofmankind

This is great if you know all those "not to do" strategies. Sometimes you learn the "not to do's" by doing. The key is to fail forward fast. Try, fail, learn, and quickly try again.

No matter how much work a man can do, no matter how engaging his personality may be, he will not advance far in business if he cannot work through others.

I cannot look at modern buildings without thinking of historical ones.

And that is my definition of democracy, the right to be in a minority and not be suppressed

New ideas are sometimes found in the most granular details of a problem where few others bother to look.

Freedom is not the sole prerogative of a chosen few, but the universal right of all God's children.