Science fiction and comedy are generally a pretty bumpy mix.

Son, if you really want something in life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

Spend your time with people who recognise and appreciate your value.

People who think nothing could go wrong are usually disappointed.

The best way for a person to have happy thoughts is to count his blessings and not his cash.

I'd hate to compare anyone with Sugar Ray Robinson, but Donald is the closest thing to Robinson I've ever seen

The conditions of praying are the conditions of righteousness, holiness, and salvation.

The stories we love best do live in us forever.

No matter how successful you get, always send the elevator back down.

When I make a film - I direct my own film, I write my own script - that's what I want to hear from the audience. 'Oh, thank you, Jackie!'

I think anything you do that's different, that doesn't take the typical approach, invites differing opinions.

Sanitised violence in movies has been accepted for years. What seems to upset everybody now is the showing of the consequences of violence.