Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

This is how you start to get respect, by offering something that you have.

Doubt grew only in the fertile darkness of solitude

I been to many malls from state to state,But I've never been in, say, one this great.I hate to say, about the other shopping centers that's left,But the Albee Square Mall is the doo-doo-def!

Im looking forward to the World Cup because I believe Wayne Rooney could be one of the major finds in world football.

What we are going to do as Democrats is put together a really strong platform that focuses on jobs and economic issues.

I really can't stand any more to pay for a burst of animation when someone comes in for drinks with a depressed and low-keyed next day, in which I have to go around on my hands and knees.

It's more important to be interesting, to be vivid, and to be adventurous than to sit pretty for pictures.

We may writhe in agony from pain Or laugh out loud when we find happiness As long as we're alive tomorrow will come we become stronger and keep on living We were born to live

What did you ASK at school today?

Kids tend to look up to sports figures and entertainers, probably more than they should, but I've tried to use that in a positive way.