See, you know how to take the reservation, you just don't know how to hold the reservation and that's really the most important part of the reservation, the holding. Anybody can just take them.

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.

These pretzels are making me thirsty!

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

The IRS! They're like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

So let me get this straight. You find yourself in the kitchen. You see an éclair in the receptacle... and you think to yourself: "What the hell, I'll just eat some trash."

People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.

Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success.

Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.

My libido was doing the humpy dance while dressed in Milkbone pasties and a thong.

We go fish, we also catch fighting fish, looking for birds and it was for kampong people, the paddy field was our the play field for the children.

Don't let your hearts grow numb. Stay alert. It is your soul which matters.

I like California but I'm dyed-in-the-wool Oklahoma. I see a deer in L.A., and everybody's standing around it taking pictures. Back home, that's the enemy!

I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way.

It is not a garment I cast off this day, but a skin that I tear with my own hands.

I don't think the Republican Party is against women.

Go home and tell your daughters they are beautiful.

don't sabotage your own greatness by succumbing to failure!

If someone is calling for democracy, he is calling for an end of a dictatorship and if this is the will of the people, this could also mean overthrowing the regime.