Self-parody is the first portent of age.

True maturity is only reached when a man realizes he has become a father figure to his girlfriends' boyfriend - and he accepts it

Only a rank degenerate would drive 1,500 miles across Texas without eating a chicken fried steak.

Backward is just not a natural direction for Americans to look - historical ignorance remains a national characteristic.

If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.

Uva uvum vivendo varia fit

People would be bored shitless if they had to love only the good in someone they care about.

A woman's love is like the morning dew. It's just as likely to settle on a horse turd as a rose.

Incompetents invariably make trouble for people other than themselves.

Yesterday's gone on down the river and you can't get it back.

If you want one thing too much it’s likely to be a disappointment. The healthy way is to learn to like the everyday things, like soft beds and buttermilk—and feisty gentlemen.

Buddhism has a term for the happiness we feel at someone else’s success or good fortune. Sympathetic joy, as it is known, invites us to celebrate for others.

Don't you think a dream would feel shy if it were seen walking about in the waking world?

To tidy up takes time, and she wants all her time for wolfing books...

I turned to him and he reached for my hand. It would have been easier to walk away. But the wind still blew around us and the house still stood.

My family has a Christmas tradition: Every year, they kill my mom.

Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend - or a meaningful day.

See, Josh, that's what you do when someone slaps you in the face. So the next time it happens to you, try to retaliate.

That's what we should do, Hazel Grace: We should team up and be this disabled vigilante duo roaring through the world, righting wrongs, defending the weak, protecting the endangered.

I am a very simple person. In spite of all that has happened to me, I have tried to remain the simple person I started out.

Flom had the same experience...He didn't triumph over adversity. Instead, what started out as adversity ended up being an opportunity.