She could feel something unnatural following her every movement as she washed her bountiful Huzza and Wahzoozie" — BATS

...causing her eyes to bulge and her tongue to flick from behind her luscious lips, scaring away insects." — Amok 2015

Elizabeth served herself to Vlad upon the Lazy Susan (Susan wasn’t lazy. She was actually dead." — Bats 2015

He sniffed until the long hairs of his mustache had been sucked up into his nose and out of his leafy ears." — Bats 2015

Purrrrrrrr” Elizabeth kneaded Vlad's pecs. “I hear a Kitty!” Vlad’s eyes sprung open. There was a moment of hurt, of sad. There was no kitty. “You’re teasing me!" — Bats

Elizabeth poured the brewskilicious foam over her aforementioned bodalicious huzza-huzzas and Wahwahzoozie." — Bats 2015

Gentle With Them Thar Spurs'—a sequel to 'Riders of the Purple Sau-Sage.' Spurs was the feminist novel of its day…which was Tuesday." —Bats 2015

Do it for the kids! The ones who look up to you — especially when they are pleading for their lives." — Bats 2015

...an ambitious array of dishonorable intentions that he intended to wield upon the Countess’s nether regions. — BATS 2015

They’re dogs. Never trust a man. Even when he’s dead. Especially when he’s dead. — Bats 2015

You’re going to show up to a duel, in the street, wearing Come F—k Me Heels?" — Bats 2015

Let your love be your guide. Let your courage be your driver, and let your passion be your road to enjoy this magnificent life to the fullest.

There is no knowing that does not begin with knowing God.

A friend is like a rope, you trust it until it snaps.

The painter constructs, the photographer discloses.

My success wasn't so much due to intelligence, but the fact that I stuck with problems longer.

We have to achieve what we can, and if we haven't yet learned that we are not always going to get our way this could be frustrating.

I'm grateful for a lot of things. One is not being a drunk wreck. Or losing all four limbs in some ridiculous East Village bus accident that I was so destined for.

The one who comes to question himself cares for mankind.

We're divorced from my father because he did some mean and scary things to us.

As the render is to the building, and the blueprint to the machine, so sport is to social existence.