Show me where Stalin is buried and I'll show you a Communist Plot.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

Well, a friend in need is a friend indeed.

Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. Early bird gets the worm, but the second worm gets to live. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

You find out your mistakes from an audience that pays admission.

Nobody seems to know yet how television is going to affect the radio, movies, love, housekeeping or the church, but it has definitely revived vaudeville.

I was asking Charlie the most important questions, and you heard the answers.

Funny, nothing ever happens nowadays.

We had to have a star each week.. Possibly our program being on Sunday and having a little fun with the Bible was dangerous.

After 13 years of life on the half shell in Hollywood, I have made a trip where I wasn't a tourist.

A woman, desires to hear nice words from a man who can praise her beauty.

Life has an end. We are all on a transit.

As counterintuitive as it seems, generosity begins wherever you are. It is important to make generosity a priority.

I hate that when people are like, "Well, all dwarves know each other, right?" And you want to get mad, but you can't because we do.

War is not only a matter of equipment, artillery, group troops or air force; it is largely a matter of spirit, or morale.

Judgment is guilt wearing a moral mask to disguise its pain.

When it comes time to default, they’re not going to remember any of the Republicans’ names. They are going to remember in history books one name, and that's Obama.

Europeans should be patient and try to find a formula to resolve this nuclear issue. We are determined to remove any ambiguities over our nuclear ambitions and also protect our right.

If Broadway shows charge preview prices while the cast is in dress rehearsal, why should restaurants charge full price when their dining room and kitchen staffs are still practicing?

The war in Iraq - if Osama was a Christian - it's the Christmas present he never would have expected.