Sin recognized but that may keep us humble, But oh, it keeps us nasty.

My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?

There's a light at the end of the tunnel. And it's a train.

My femininity is always something I've tried to preserve in this dog-eat-dog world.

I went out to dinner with a Marine last weekend. He looked across the table and he goes, "I could kill you in seven seconds." I go, "I'll just have toast, then."

I don't visit my parents often because Delta Airlines won't wait in the yard while I run in.

The best contraceptive is the word no - repeated frequently.

I hate people. People make me pro-nuclear.

I can't get a relationship to last longer than it takes to make copies of their tapes.

If I had been the Virgin Mary, I would have said "No."

My mom's Jewish and my dad's Irish Catholic alcoholic, so I whine on the inside.

Pleasures are the things that appeal to our flesh and to our lust. But joy is something else. Joy runs deep.

Do you believe in other universes? Do you think there's another dimension where we're happy?

Upon being given a Bible, President Abraham Lincoln replied, "In regard to this Great book, I have but to say, it is the best gift God has given to man.

A better tomorrow starts with the things that you doing with today's moments. I hope you are staying creative and productive with your time and energy?

My mom and I always had a great bond. It was always a natural friendship bond since early on. My mom was 18 when she had me.

Once an old woman at my church said the secret is that God loves us exactly the way we are and that he loves us too much to let us stay like this, and I'm just trying to trust that.

If you've given the greatest effort that you can expect of yourself, you always get what you deserve.

Lots of comics try stuff out all year round, which is very sensible - I don't.

When you are a startup you need to hire very fast, and sometimes you have to restructure very fast.

Each moment you are alive is a gem. It needs you to breathe gently for the miracles to be displayed.