So ‘fatal’ only kills you two out of three times these days? That’s good to know.

Be yourself. Unless you can be a unicorn, In that case, you should always be a unicorn.

I slump in my chair, thinking how a narcotic party of one is no party at all.

Aw, you’re nothing but heart, Mako. Nice valentine in your skull, by the way. Is that temporary or did the Tanaka-kai change their daimon to attract the Powerpuff Girls crowd?

If you ever pull a switcheroo like that again, Dee, I’m going to offer your boyfriend ten thousand dollars to make out with Alice for two minutes.

Faye, if you got eaten by another shark, would you please at least have the decency to say so? My time is kind of limited, if you know what I’m sayin’.

Turns out making a dramatic exit is a lot harder when you have to stand there and wait another twenty minutes for a boat to dock.

Enjoy your little run because there’s no way you get off this boat without her trying to slice your Achilles in half.

The words ‘drink me’ come to mind. Anyone besides me up for some heavy alcohol consumption?

Oh, Alice, you haven’t even had a taste of my romantic streak yet. And when the time’s right I don’t think I’ll have to ‘try’ to have my way with you. I just WILL.

Have you thrown ‘Why is a raven like a writing desk?’ at her yet?

I just have to trust that the story is going to shake out in such a way that's going to be palatable to readers.

Nixon had some large achievements in foreign affairs. They will be remembered. But a president probably gets remembered for one thing, and Watergate will head the Nixon list, I suspect.

Maybe your history just repeats and repeats until it batters you enough to snap the seams that hold you together

I believe that I was a dog in a past life. That's the only thing that would explain why I like to snack on Purina Dog Chow.

And they [illegal immigrants] will come back, but they are going to have to go out, and hopefully they get back.

If I was in a room with a bunch of skinheads talking about racism, then I would be disturbed, but after we finished a take, we were normal people again.

A true hero is not someone who thinks about doing what is right, but one that simply does what is right without thinking!

No amount of study of present forms [of life] would permit us to infer [the existence of] dinosaurs

When you find your purpose, it is like your heart has been set alight with passion. You know it absolutely, without any doubt.

In the world of bad movies, 'Death to Smoochy' is a towering achievement.