So many kids are fat drug addicts these days, it's almost as if Rush Limbaugh had puppies.

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

The dream is a distant goal.

No great city has ever been known for its abundant supply of parking.

I love fashion. I like looking fresh and wearing new stuff.

I'm fortunate to be able to draw in different styles, but each style demands another approach from the previous.

Books are only the shadow and life the real thing. I believe this as strongly as any belief I hold.

No man is sane who does not know how to be insane on proper occasions.

As part of the process by which you hire me, you hire me. You just don't hire an hour of me to do a performance.

Devil, do you dare approach me? and do you not fear the fierce vengeance of my arm wreaked on your miserable head?

I don't want to sound like too much of a drama queen! But I'm not going to tell you, 'Oh, it's just so much fun.' It's work [working on film].

Satisfaction linked with dishonor or with harm to others is a prison for the seeker.