...So put a gerbil on your Christmas list.

Not to sound cynical, but all you ever learn in prison is how to be a better criminal.

These soliloquies explain our people's lack of stability You keepin it real, but ain't got a clue what reality really be See the diameter of your knowledge Is the circumference of your activity

I circumnavigate the globe with a one-liner like latitude.

Plasma on the wall/Write my name on your heart like I'm Lucille Ball/But love changes, a thug changes/And best friends become strangers

"I got niggaz lookin' for Websters like George Papadopolis'

I'm bangin' from Belize to Tel Aviv on the Red Sea Racin' Saddam Hussein on Kawasaki jet ski's

We runnin around in thousand-dollar clown suits, Better get some boots when Lucifer turn your city to Beirut.

My life is Avatar, your life is Precious.

Now that Bin Laden dead, can we get our civil liberties back? That George Bush stole with the Patriot Act?

I got 304's in 310 on Section 8, with multiple 187's... Sport a Marilyn Manson t-shirt when I die and go to heaven.

I felt like one of Apollo's sacred cows- slow, dumb, and bright red.

Tell him, ' the colonel said, smiling, 'that a person doesn’t die when he should but when he can.

Stop looking for flaws, and kindness come much more easily.

You block your dream when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith.

Women get the attention when we get into the men's arena, and that's sad.

Attention, if sudden and close, graduates into surprise; and this into astonishment; and this into stupefied amazement.

Jay Carney told the reporters at his morning briefing that he hoped they would watch the new movie about Obama's first term 'many times.' They might. Look how well 'Titanic' did at the box office.

The only way to deliver to the people who are achieving is to not burden them with the people who are not achieving.

Funk never dies. It is eternal. It just smells a little different from time to time.

When things go right (and they go right a lot - you just got to keep trying) there is nothing to really laugh about.