Soap, like people, shouldn't smell like anything.

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

Being kind is more important than being right.

I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.

Everyone starts out being an atheist. No one is born with belief in anything. Infants are atheists until they are indoctrinated.

People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

Pursuit of passion,

Your reciept is your library card." -- On what killed the brick and mortar bookstores.

Simplicity makes me happy.

Running toward danger is foolhardy. ... But so is closing your eyes to it. Many perils become less dangerous once you understand their potential hazards.

Father! Can I box him? Please!

He that can please nobody is not so much to be pitied as he that nobody can please.

It would be necessary that they should be already sages to love wisdom...

What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?

When I started to write, it was the '70s, and throughout that decade, we didn't have any problems with book challenges or censorship.

A friend in need is a friend to be avoided.