Some kids do drugs. Some kids light stuff on fire. Me, I eat oats.

I dove on those papers like Sherlock Holmes on a cappuccino binge.

You look like a handsome young man…although you might want to zip your fly. Mom! What? Should I have not told you and left it for everyone else to notice at the dance?

Instead of agonizing about the things you can't change, why don't you try working on the things you can change

Chicks dig a dude who’s sporting the latest eggplant turtleneck styles.

But nobody ever tells you in advance when you should concentrate on the good times-that's why you're supposed to do it every day.

If you promise you will get better instead of dying, I promise I will, too.

It was like seeing Bill Gates at age thirteen, times two. And half of him was wearing a cheerleader uniform. Yes, I know that’s a weird image.

There are really no guidelines whatsoever, because this is the kind of thing that only happens to ME.

And if there was one thing I'd finally figured out, it was that your mind is something you always CAN change.

(Yes teenage boys who are fine always cry on their mothers’ shoulders until they leave a snot trail.)

When you tap into the energy of possibility, there is always something greater than potential can give you.

The real hero is always a hero by mistake he dreams of being an honest coward like everybody else.

The thing I loved the most - and still love the most about teaching - is that you can connect with an individual or a group, and see that individual or group exceed their limits.

Honestly, I never really put the mic down.

Teachings that do not speak of pain have no meaning...because humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return.

No one who traces the history of motherhood, of the home, of child-rearing practices will ever assume the eternal permanence of our own way of institutionalizing them.

I drink too much coffee.

Man is quite insane. He wouldn?t know how to create a maggot, and he creates Gods by the dozen.

If I'm just in dungarees, I don't think I would intimidate anyone.