Some of them wanted to sell me snake oil and I'm not necessarily going to dismiss all of these, as I have never found a rusty snake.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

My words are the kisses but many of the times they don't taste so good as the touch of your lips does to mine.

It's only adults who read the top layers most of the time. I think children read the internal meanings of everything.

Equality has no place for genius.

I was always fascinated by the infinite, strange and 'scandalous' ways that insects copulate.

When people feel safe, they can come up with ideas. It's important to listen to the actor who is there on the stage and living it.

My job is to teach them to believe they could perform better than they realize. Great coaches teach athletes to go beyond the barriers.

I'm not a gentle pony... I promise you, you will have to work to keep your seat.

The people hung upon His words - that is, until they hung Him on a cross. Admiration is fleeting. Love is eternal.

Asking Wall Street to provide financial education is the same as asking a fox to raise your chickens.

There is, apparently, some law of nature decreeing that all home construction must double in its projected cost and take four times longer than originally anticipated.