Some people are widely read. I'm thinly read.

Religion and philosophy, philosophy and religion - they're two words which are both ... different. In spelling.

If there is a God, his plan is very similar to someone not having a plan.

If you've never seen an elephant ski, then you've never been on acid.

Guns don't kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).

I just believe in the goodwill of people, the power of people to do something positive.

I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.

They’re not women’s clothes. They’re my clothes. I bought them.

MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.

Never put a sock in a toaster.

I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.

You can't just plan a moment when things get back on track, just as you can't plan the moment you lose your way in the first place.

... motherhood is a game you must enter with as much energy, willingness, and happiness as possible.

We are all born bonded to nature; that's why we put depictions of flowers and forests, rather than bulldozers or log piles, on our walls.

Pick a man, any man. Every guy I fall for becomes Jesus Christ within the first twenty four hours.

Power itself is simply a word to describe attention, awareness, which embodies all things.

It just goes to show, if you try to ruin someone's life, it only gets better. You just don't get to be a part of it.

I live to play music, and hang out with my wife and kid, and hang out with my friends, and discover the world. Read books, watch movies, see art, see the world, meet new people.

Botox should be banned for actors, as steroids are for sportsmen. Acting is all about expression; why would you want to iron out a frown?

I love standup and I haven't given it up.

Undoubtedly the war with Iraq was a tragedy. I think it was also a crime.