Some people have religion as a means of solace. But, I had a dreidel, so that was out.

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'

Elected officials shouldn’t get to choose who gets to choose elected officials.

If a group of people - leaders - can convince a group of folk who barely have a pot to piss in that the rich shouldn't be taxed-- THAT is leadership!

When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out.

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.

Well there's these things called books.... They are like TV for smart people.

Relying only on logic, on what can be factually established, may inform or intimidate, but it will rarely stir anyone into action or change.

Obviously I was challenged by becoming a Naval aviator, by landing aboard aircraft carriers and so on.

I don't think Hillary Clinton will get any sort of political honeymoon like George W Bush or Barack Obama enjoyed.

I wanted to keep these trunks as a souvenir." "Now look at them." "They were splattered with blood.

I remember when I was young, many cities in the Muslim world were cosmopolitan cities with a lot of culture.

Link yourself to your potential, not to your past.

A home without a dog is merely a shelter.

Introversion - along with its cousins sensitivity, seriousness, and shyness - is now a second-class personality trait, somewhere between a disappointment and a pathology.

The most useful thing about art is it's uselessness.