Some scientists want to replace the handshake with the fist bump. Others want to replace the fist bump with the 'tush push.'

Work hard, be kind, and amazing things will happen.

Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!'

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh.'

If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice.

A new report says that dogs can sniff out prostate cancer with almost 98 percent accuracy. The report also finds that cats can sniff it out with 100 percent accuracy but they prefer to watch you die.

I have an abacus at home.

A new presidential poll reveals that Democrats have the edge among voters under 30. The good news for Republicans is that there's only six people under 30 who actually vote.

Ukraine announced plans to open Chernobyl, their nuclear disaster site, to tourists. They say it's just like Disneyland, except the 6-foot mouse is real.

Santa will be showing up with Rudolph the Red-Eyed Reindeer.

After making insulting remarks about Mexicans, Donald Trump has been kicked off of NBC and Univision. On the bright side, Trump's hair has a new show on Animal Planet.

You more than anyone else deserve to be loved and happy. Do not remain in any relationship that robs you of those two things.

The world is ancient, but it has not lost its newness.

Luck has nothing to do with it, because I have spent many, many hours, countless hours, on the court working for my one moment in time, not knowing when it would come.

All I want to do is be a good dad, but I'm pretty bad at it.

Passing is your best weapon against man to man. Dribble penetration is your best weapon against zone.

I believe when you're writing film or television, you can't rely on a crutch or rule that exists outside of the narrative of the film.

If you do not think about the future, you cannot have one.

I make it through the first two weeks of school without a nuclear meltdown.

Fortunately, when it comes to meat and poultry, I have the really wonderful situation of having producers and processors that produce and process a very high-quality product.

Why fly like a hen when you can soar like an eagle?