Some women can be fooled all of the time, and all women can be fooled some of the time, but the same woman can't be fooled by the same man in the same way more than half of the time.

A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

A man never knows how to say goodbye; a woman never knows when to say it.

A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.

A good woman inspires a man, a brilliant woman interests him, a beautiful woman fascinates him, but a sympathetic woman gets him.

Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

When the heart accepts death first, words you can trust are feelings you can take.

When we do 'Sports Illustrated, ' it starts the night before. You do a St. Tropez tan that night, then baby oil gel, then body color.

All political power is a trust.

Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

We've created more wealth in the past 30 years than the rest of human of human history combined. But half of Americans make less than $17 an hour.

It is a great art to be superior to others without letting them know it.

I believe that for the small numbers of Jewish people in the United States, they exercise a tremendous amount of influence on the affairs of government.

All intelligent problem solvers are subject to the same ultimate constraints - limitations on space, time, and materials.

Be yourself and you will find, who minds doesn't matter and who matters won't mind.

I think my English is bad.