Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you're interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.

No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone... you answer it.

The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching.

What did the 5 fingers say to the face. S L A P!

I think extreme sports are really good for relieving stress.

You know, be able to do something great in your life, you're gonna have to realize your failures. You're gonna have to embrace them and figure out how to overcome it.

Dave! Relax! Close your buttcheeks!

Cause my life is dope, and I do dope sh*t

I support anyone's right to be who they want to be. My question is: to what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?

The mark of greatness is when everything before you is obsolete, and everything after you bears your mark.

Chivalry is dead. Women killed it.

Water is intrinsically linked to the mystery and excitement of discovering new worlds.

Some artists are normal people who just happen to make things because we can't figure out how in the hell to communicate with people.

Yesterday, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he would run for governor of California. The announcement was good news for Florida residents who now live in the second flakiest state in the country.

Big Texas (Nolan Ryan) is here. The reason I like to keep Nolan around is he is a reminder that when we got done with the Sammy Sosa trade, there was still some talent on the Rangers.

Dancing is the last word in life. In dancing one draws nearer to oneself.

Every writer knows a lot more about their characters and story than actually makes it onto the page.

No day is safe from news of you.

Street Photography is like fishing. Catching the fish is more exciting than eating it.

Blud's thicker than water.

Loneliness is equal to the radius of one's awareness.