Sometimes a joke that doesn't work just needs a breath or a little word or the tiniest little change to be fixed.

Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

We need to stop telling girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't.

I do love poop. I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants. I enjoy being clever and pithy and political, but nothing's going to get me like dumb stuff.

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.

I hope the Jews did kill Christ, I'd do it again in a second.

Drew Friedman isn't just a brilliant artist. He takes you to a place. He takes you back in time. He makes you smell the stale cigarettes and cold brisket and you say, thank you for the pleasure.

They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

I like talking about things that are taboo, because it makes them not taboo anymore.

Integrity is something we show, not proclaim.

Healing—takes time, and—so does—not healing.Chose—how you spend your time —wisely.

Before you can brighten the corner where you are, you must first develop dislike for the initial dull corner you once endured. You can’t change what you are comfortable with.

The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence

Sometimes you have to avoid mentioning things because people's feelings are tender.

I still think it would be a great mistake to go into a war without support of our friends and allies.

Wait, wait. I don't get it.' 'That is because you only have eight functioning brain cells.

In real life as in grand opera, arias only make hopeless situations worse.

It doesn't matter if you have a desperate heart when you have to sing about joy; it doesn't matter if you're scared to death when the lights go on.

How can love let it go when it has no place to go? And I can't go along pretending that love isn't here to stay... Catch me I'm falling for you.