Sometimes, magic is like that. It lands on your head like a piano, a stupid, ancient, unfunny joke, and you spend the rest of your life picking sharps and flats out of your hair.

Magic has a logic, like algebra. Once you get to know it, it's easy. If this, then that. You write with a pencil, you don't make frog soup with it.

Don't worry, my little lump of rock. Everybody gets a chance to choose. Or else where would irony come from?

Still life is boring. Never stand still! Jumping bean life!

I shall be as brave as a my Toad, he thought, for my Toad never hides under the bed when she is afraid of lightning or bats. She sticks out her tongue and eats them.

all children are required to attend School, which is like a party to which everyone forgot to bring punch, or hats, or fiddles, and none of the games have good prizes.

Now, in the Kingdom of School, to be asked into another child's room is like being asked inside their heart.

Rules are for those who can't think of a better way.

I'm not afraid of you!' The wombat yelled. 'I saw you get stuck in the washing machine once. Round and round you went! Who's afraid of something that can't defeat a rinse cycle?

A fellow has to believe in something, Jay-such as the rottenness of humanity.

Dream is meant to be original. There is no honor in trying to be a copy of someone else's dream life.

We now live in a world where the only thing to have is success, but failure is marvelous. It's fertiliser, it's like living fertiliser, because you're forced on yourself.

I always get bored with my hair. That's why I would always change it throughout my career.

When war becomes a trade, it benefits, like all other trades, from the division of labour.

America has been conditioned to think of pasta as the never-ending pasta bowl and Olive Garden.

Whenever I feel nervous, I feel like I have to poop.

Thank goodness I've saved my money.

But to me, to be original is to be yourself.

Society demands conformity at the expense of individual liberty. Let us be for once a non conformist to be fully alive.