Sooner or later, everybody pays the Piper!

Just when you think you know the answers, I change the questions.

I'm so quick, I could spit in the wind, duck, and let it hit the old lady behind me.

You'll find sympathy in the dictionary between sh*t and suicide.

I walk so fast, I talk so fast, I could turn the light off and be in bed before the room's dark.

You don't throw rocks at a man with a machine gun!

I'm the reason Hulk Hogan lost his hair.

I don't need to know how tough I am to know how tough I am.

My friends keep telling me I'm doing it with Mary Palmer. That's not true - I'm too busy masturbating to meet anyone new.

I was pissin' Vince McMahon off when the red on the back of your neck was diaper rash!

Ric Flair, you once called me a woman. Well, what I want to know is, how does it feel to get beat by a woman?

The Christian optimism is based on the fact that we do not fit in to the world.

My father always said, 'Never trust anyone whose TV is bigger than their book shelf' - so I make sure I read.

Showing off is the fool's idea of glory.

What is at a peak is certain to decline. He who shows his hand will surely be defeated. He who can prevail in battle by taking advantage of his enemy's doubts is invincible.

I hate sequels. They're never as good as the first book.

The best that an individual can do is to concentrate on what he or she can do, in the course of a burning effort to do it better.

I'm a little bit of a makeout king. I don't discriminate too much.

I missed Breaking Bad and people just go on and on about it until you're blue in the face with envy and you've got to watch it.

I was lucky enough to have one of the first high school classes in the country.

I had a feeling once about mathematics - that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go.