Stand-up is great because I can get everything off my chest.

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

If I am only sure of one thing in life, it's that it's meant to be lived!

You should not be subjected to the pressures, the intimidation, whether by Government or by the private sector, which would force you into self-censorship.

I grew up poor. I never had any money. I was a hobo, you know, ride the freights

I have and I will always work to promote a civil public discourse.

My ambition is to one day shed my wardrobe and figure out how to look like Gilles Bensimon - or a famous stylist - who travels with a Birkin bag and minimal accoutrement and somehow looks cool.

The end of creation is that all things may return to the Creator and be united with Him.

My opinion of art is that a man should have love for it, because my idea is that he paints from his heart and mind.

Painting is really good fun, I have always enjoyed it. As long as I paint what I want with the freedom that I enjoy, I never tire.

Go out into the world today and love the people you meet. Let your presence light new light in the hearts of people.