Stop giving yourself permission to fail

I stamped, certified, and lipsticked my life in a package sent through Priority Mail directly to the devil herself...and there's no turning back.

Nothing dies in Hell.

Comedy is a distortion of what is happening, and there will always be something happening.

If we love our country, we should also love our countrymen.

The opportunities of man are limited only by his imagination. But so few have imagination that there are ten thousand fiddlers to one composer.

It's almost like it's my alter ego when I get on stage... I turn into this different person, seriously. Bipolar disorder. I'm tired of everybody touching me and things being plugged into my head.

Americans stick their nose where it doesn't belong more than Cyrano de Bergerac giving head.

The mere existence of atomic weapons implies the possibility of their use.

The players I respected most were the toughest players, not those who talked a good game or blocked a shot and acted like a fool.

Yeah, I still feel as if I have things to do really. I'm not ready to stop.