Stripping away the irrational, the illogical, and the impossible, I am left with atheism. I can live with that.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

Managing change is no longer a one-time initiative, and change management turns to be a strategical ongoing capability in today’s digital organizations.

When someone is crying and her heart is torn, Be an angel of kindness and help her to carry on.

Once when he was still young, I saw a bit of his scalp showing through his hair and I was afraid. But it was just a cowlick. Now sometimes it shows through for real, but I feel only tenderness.

The only way to bring peace to the earth is to learn to make our own life peaceful.

Metal is easily my favorite thing - Exodus and Anthrax and Megadeth - so it just kind of organically came through in the standup act.

Writing music is just something that I was born to do.

Long, flat expanses of professionalism bother me. I'd rather have a band that could explode at any time.

Comics are an international language, they can cross boundaries and generations. Comics are a bridge between all cultures.

I wanted to try something different. Most people my age go off to college; I thought I'd try out New York.

Seeking the good is not primarily about rules and commandments.