Struggling at anything that you want to be doing is hard

In any profession, there's a sleazy side and an honorable side

You don't quite know how drunk you are until all of a sudden you're on the floor

My best attribute is knowing when not to answer stupid questions

I think smart is sexy. I like smart people. People that are comfortable with themselves I think is very sexy. My cat is really sexy.

I'm involved in Project ALS which is trying to get money for stem cell research. That's one I've been pretty involved with because if you can cure that, you can cure so many other diseases.

If it's a really good gift, I love receiving it, like jewels, small islands.

Feeding is a very important ritual for me. I don't trust people who don't like to eat.

The critics tend to forget their own answers after a while

Size counts. That's all.

I dont have any blonde friends.

Suffering ceases to be suffering when we form a clear picture of it.

The problem is never the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Think before you rush into action.

Captive Greece captured her rude conqueror

But it works that way if it works.

Festivals are unique. They can be the best of times or the worst. You're not playing to the converted. But those are the best shows - to see if you can make new friends and entertain them.

It's just to break things up between stand-up gigs. I would only do it periodically. Maybe just an East Coast thing.

Generally, dictatorships do not work in marriage - or, for that matter, in any other relationship.

All things are in a state of flux.

He nuzzled my neck, inhaling deeply. “Mmm. You smell so good.” “Oh, yeah,” I said, smirking. “I call this new perfume ‘Le Jungle grime et tropical BO.’ ” “Dirt and sweat. Very sexy.

It is beautiful to be what you are.