Telling people they look relaxed makes them look relaxed.

Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.

Fondue sets, martini shakers and juicing machines: three things the world could live completely without.

If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure.

Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them.

Eagles are seagulls with a good hairdo.

We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude.

Is there anything in the world more annoyingly creepy than an unspoken dress code?

When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.

Bright New Year for a blessed beginning.

Having fun while learning feels like playing a game.

When they told him this, Ransom at last understood why mythology was what it was -- gleams of celestial strength and beauty falling on a jungle of filth and imbecility.

A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.

You have to go broke three times to learn how to make a living.

We cannot even reproduce our thoughts entirely in words.

A joke is necessary at this time.

When Satan's not in the mood, virtue triumphs. Hasn't even Satan a right not to be in the mood once in a while?

Design is not art. Design is utilitarian, art is not.

I think I cause a lot of headaches for editors - it's impossible to keep up with the ridiculous amount of changes I make.