Thank heaven Election Day is over. No more campaign ads, no more mud-slinging, no more candidates pretending they're straight. It's over!

I freely admit I'm confused. I'm a confused and troubled individual but at the same time...Its Free!

I used to psych myself up before the show and now I do the complete opposite: I psych myself down. It's 12:30 at night, you don't want some guy yelling at you. You want some guy just talking to you.

From 1934 to 1963, the biggest criminals in America ended up on Alcatraz. Nowadays they end up on Wall Street.

I think when you become a parent you go from being a star in the movie of your own life to the supporting player in the movie of someone else's.

A new survey says one in three adults will be dressing up for Halloween. As for me, I'm not going to do anything. I'm going as Congress.

This story is true. Of course, there are many lies therein and most of it did not happen, but it's all true. In that sense it is deeply religious, perhaps even biblical.

There's something spiritual in hard work. Spirituality isn't all aromatherapy and scented candles.

There's something I believe wholeheartedly: Cynicism is the true refuge of the pseudo-intellectual, .. Cynicism is easy. Joy is an extremely advanced spiritual and intellectual tenet.

HD doesn't mean anything to me. It's a technical thing. It's like demographics. A lot of people know about it.

I didn't say no because between safety and adventure I choose adventure.

Be positive. Believe that you will succeed. See it, go for it. No matter what the odds, most of the battle is inside your own head. -- Bob Mayer

He seemed not to know the uses of silence.

Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue.

A calamity does not descend except due to a sin and it is not lifted except with repentance.

English clubs are very exclusive. I played Royal Foxshire and they made me wear a suit and tie. . . in the shower.

We're all filled with naturally recurring patterns that make us unique - they're called talents. And our charge is to bloody well use them.

Hitting your head against a wall is not the fastest way to move it.

No men who really think deeply about women retain a high opinion of them; men either despise women or they have never thought seriously about them.

Everyone needs an editor.

It is easy to love people when they smell good, but sometimes they slip into the manure of life and smell awful. You must love them just as much when they smell foul.