Thank you to every American who has not sued me so far.

To single out a particular group and say we can't make a joke about them is almost a form of prejudice and it's kind of patronizing.

I think if you come from a history of persecution you have to develop a sense of humour.

It's nice to be important, but it's also important to be nice. Never forget that.

Follow your dreams, work hard, practice and persevere. Get plenty of exercise and maintain a healthy lifestyle.

A good wife must be strong enough to pull a plough and have a very erotic physique.

For a number of years in England nobody had any idea what I looked like.

Jews have a tendency to become comedians.

The worrying thing is there's so much latent hatred of the guy [Donald Trump] and this guy isn't even president yet.

I think pulling off, pulling off a kind of fake documentary of me being a, you know, actual dictator would have been extremely difficult, if not impossible.

Normally in dangerous situations I have a getaway car.

Every time someone tells me I can't do something the more I want to do it, not to prove them wrong but because I always knew I could do it.

Miranda waited. No voice spoke. No heavenly choir broke out in song. God Himself did not call her name. She frowned. Typical.

Do not give in too much to feelings. A overly sensitive heart is an unhappy possession on this shaky earth.

Being a new band, I just can't think of a better way to get your name out to all of the Hard-Rock crowd than playing with twenty of the biggest Hard-Rock bands in the world.

I don't want Daddy's passion to ever end. I want to help endangered wildlife just like he did.

it is not given to everyone to shine in adversity.

Think globally, act locally": "Our salvation depends upon our ability to create a religion of nature.

Comedians are thinkers. The best ones are akin to philosophers, in my opinion.

A beautiful friendship can change people.

You can't produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant.