That American Taliban kid Johnny Walker was indicted today. Ten counts of terrorism. He could get 5 life sentences. In Taliban terms, that's 360 virgins.

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog.

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.

You are looking at the world from your window, that’s good, but there is something missing here, something very big: You must also look at your window from the world to see yourself!

Meeting you was not the first day of the rest of my life

Sometimes, The Things We Can't Change End Up Changing Us.

Will, without reason, is a blind man's motion; will, against reason, is a madman's motion.

Affection cannot be created; it can only be liberated.

It's better sometimes when we don't get to touch our dreams.

There is no one else who can ever fill your role in the same way, so it's a good idea to perform it as well as possible.

Everything in the media is fleeting. Don't get the wrong idea. Fame is when you're still the hot topic next week or even the week after.

Happiness is the secret ingredient for successful businesses. If you have a happy company it will be invincible.

I've got spider veins all over my legs, so I wear opaque tights all winter. All sorts of colours.