That is how we writers all started: by reading. We heard the voice of a book speaking to us.

But nothing is more opaque than absolute transparency.

I hope that people will finally come to realize that there is only one 'race' - the human race - and that we are all members of it.

Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.

Canada was built on dead beavers.

A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there's less of you.

We still think of a powerful man as a born leader and a powerful woman as an anomaly.

You can only be jealous of someone who has something you think you ought to have yourself.

Nature is to zoos as God is to churches.

If the national mental illness of the United States is megalomania, that of Canada is paranoid schizophrenia.

Another belief of mine; that everyone else my age is an adult, whereas I am merely in disguise.

The smallest issues can become the most important things in life and reality slips away.

Miss, I'd gladly pay you to remove your clothes.

Everything human beings can imagine has been thrown at injustice, and injustice just absorbs it, and enlarges.

I cannot stand beer. But I love wine.

News is what someone wants suppressed. Everything else is advertising.

The true comic muse is the one with tears running down under her laughing mask.

Everyone with an iPhone is a journalist in their own way now, especially because we live in a tabloid culture.

Let's throw it on the wall and see if it sticks.

To me, that's what music is: creating a mood, and taking the listener to the place that you're going.

Running is not just a sport but a biological necessity.