That is my principal objection to life, I think: It's too easy, when alive, to make perfectly horrible mistakes.

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.

There is a tragic flaw in our precious constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.

I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all the kinds of things you can't see from the center.

He didn't look like a soldier at all. He looked like a filthy flamingo.

Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae.

Perhaps I am the turtle, able to live simply anywhere, even underwater for short periods, with my home on my back.

About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm.

We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

The sh*t's gonna splatter, start buggin, yo..."Mencheres to Cat

Don't make it worse by thinking it's more painful than it actually is.

Marriage should be a duet - when one sings, the other claps.

Some people are more affected by, I hate to use the word "success," but I don't know what else to say, but some people are more affected by that than others.

What if people knew they were recycled? Would that change anything?

Coincidence is the science of the true believer.

In order to be great, you have to learn from greatness, which is what I have tried to do.

I don't want to retire. I'm not that good at crossword puzzles

Even genius is tied to profit.

The live concerts are everything and I’m very grateful that most of my career, I’m a live artist, I’ve been doing this. So I’ve traveled quite a lot, played in - I never stopped playing.