That part of your friend which it is your privilege to contemplate in your adversity

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

I've always loved film and wanted to work in film. I just love working and creating new characters, and trying different genres and different things.

Try not to look sideways to see how others are viewing our lives but to look up to see how heavenly father sees us.

Well, I started thinking about what you were saying about how your movies need to make a profit. Now, what is the one thing, if you put it in a movie, it'll be successful?

I really enjoyed working on 'Dumb & Dumberer' with Cheri Oteri, maybe because we are both into improvisations. We were meant to act together.

London is like the tropical bush -- if you don't exercise constant care the jungle, in the shape of the slums, will break in.

My meals were easily made, for they were all alike and simple, only a cupful of tea and bread.

People like to feel entitled, whether they're actually entitled or not.

Hot dogs always seem better out than at home; so do French-fried potatoes; so do your children.

I'm quite modest. I don't want to tell people I'm a leader.

Philosophy is the art and law of life, and it teaches us what to do in all cases, and, like good marksmen, to hit the white at any distance.