That's the thing about the internet. It's really good at giving you pointless facts like how many horses a star owns, but not important things like how to invade his trailer.

Peacocks have the bright feathers. Fish have the long tails. Women have the mall.

Happy is entirely up to you and always has been.

The key to happiness - as any good fairy godmother will tell you - is not to avoid problems, but to overcome them.

What was God thinking when he created a guy this handsome? He wasn't a gift to womankind, he was a torture device.

Sometimes love not only lifts you to the ceiling, it also keeps your eyes there.

I don't care what you Yanks say, cheese should not whiz.

Beauty has a persuasive power all its own.

Many perfumes promise to lure men to women. None of them smell of motherhood. None of them proclaim the wearer to be tidy, thrifty, and sensible.

You need to be more careful, or you could hurt yourself.

I didn't bother to explain about the glitter in my hair. I figured they could think it was a family trait. We all glittered, just like the Cullens in Twilight.

Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.

He is where he is supposed to be. And yet the place he has found is also of his own choosing. That is a piece of luck not to be despised.

How do you know when an apology is true—when it means something, or can change something, or will last outside the moment?

If you truly want to measure the success of a man, you do not measure it by a position he has achieved, but by the obstacles he has overcome.

Awake. Be the witness of your thoughts. The elephant hauls himself from the mud. In the same way drag yourself out of your sloth.

I was the basest of readers. All I wanted was my own world, and myself in it, given back to me in artful shapes and accessible form.

Friends must always be treated as if one day they might be enemies.

May not the wolf, as the proverb says, claim a hearing?

It's the first gift that's always the hardest to pay back.

I bought a blimp just so I could get a bunch of wankers excited over nothing, what did you do with your weekend?