That which is escaped now is pain to come.

God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.

The more varied the environments in which you exercise your leadership gift, the stronger that gift will become. You will become a far more effective leader.

Wise leaders understand that the single greatest determinant of whether followers will ever own a vision deeply is the extent to which whose followers believe the leader will own it.

Hunger is the best sauce.

Joys impregnate. Sorrows bring forth.

A woman hath nine lives like a cat.

Golf: A plague invented by the Calvinistic Scots as a punishment for man's sins.

He that hath knowledge spareth his words.

If everyone helps to hold up the sky, then one person does not become tired.

A people religiously right, will not long remain politically wrong.

Prison widens your circle of friends. In my stand-up, I can now talk about things that no one else has the right to touch.

Absurdity is what I like most in life.

A pessimist doesn't see the sunset outside, he sees the dirt on the window.

A dentist is only half the doctor he claims to be.

Fashion is a capricious deity.

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.

Tragedy has the great moral defect of giving too much importance to life and death.

When you choose to be an actor, you are going against the odds.

We'll rock till we drop. We have all agreed this won't be the last time. Everyone's rocking.

I try to tell the story about the song with the believability that I've lived it myself and I understand what it's all about.