The British secret service was staffed at one point almost entirely by alcoholic homosexuals working for the KGB

Whoever called snooker "chess with balls" was rude, but right.

Snooker is just chess with balls.

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

A sceptic finds Dallas absurd. A cynic thinks the public doesn't

It is only when they go wrong that machines remind you how powerful they are.

A life without fame can be a good life, but fame without a life is no life at all.

Fiction is life with the dull bits left out.

Disco dancing is just the steady thump of a giant moron knocking in an endless nail.

They had a... dog called Bluey. A know psychopath, Bluey would attack himself if nothing else was available.

She was good at playing abstract confusion in the same way that a midget is good at being short.

Be kind to others and you will find that others are kind to you. Being positive will spread positivity back to you. If you give out a pleasant energy, you will receive a pleasant energy.

Speaking as a Christian, I find the Apostle Paul appealing and the apostle Peale appalling.

You know your strengths but you must know your weaknesses more.

I think sexuality is a window into someone's soul.

Whatever you love is beautiful; love comes first, beauty follows. The greater your capacity for love, the more beauty you find in the world.

You don't have to be a genius when you're surrounded by morons.

We seldom require more to the happiness of the present hour than to surpass him that stands next before us.

Too many brands treat social media as a one way, broadcast channel, rather than a two-way dialogue through which emotional storytelling can be transferred.

That's the great thing about doing good: Anyone can do it, any time, no waiting periods or batteries required.

Remember that a share of stock represents a part of a business and is not just a piece of paper.