The Cards lead the Dodgers 4-2 after one inning and that one hasn't even started.

The new Haitian baseball can't weigh more than four ounces or less than five.

Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and it rolls off! It's rolling all the way back to second base! This is a terrible thing for the Padres!

Sometimes big trees grow out of acorns - I think I heard that from a squirrel.

Hats off to drug abusers everywhere.

Those amateur umpires are certainly flexing their fangs tonight.

He slides into second with a stand-up double.

And Kansas City is at Chicago tonight, or is it Chicago at Kansas City? Well, no matter as Kansas City leads in the eighth 4 to 4.

Hector Torrez, how can you communicate with Enzo Hernandez when he speaks Spanish and you speak Mexican?

There is someone warming up in the Giants' bullpen, but he's obscured by his number.

Ozzie Smith just made another play that I've never seen anyone else make before, and I've seen him make it more often than anyone else ever has.

Mychael Eiliesor. Guardian paladin, sacred protector, master spellsinger, fashion consultant.

You have been around since scaly things crawled out of the muck, would it have killed you to read a book?

Ramses had always been fond of Helen, in his peculiar fashion, but if he had looked at me as he was looking at her, I would have sent for a constable.

We need a system that serves our needs, not the needs of others. Remember, under a Trump administration it's called America first. Remember that.

I think the National League has better biorhythms in July.

If I were in a position to announce a public competition to coin a new word, I would do so right now.

In love abides all knowledge. It is mankind's love and interest in things that in time reveals their secret.

On the way here this guy steps up to us and says, 'Would you like to join Jehovah's Witnesses?' and Rocky (Graziano) says 'I didn't see nuttin!'

He who knows he has enough is rich.

Mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity.