The Democratic Party might be called the Takings Coalition, made up of groups that want the government to take from American citizens -- usually cash -- and keep it for itself.

We don't need someone who can think. We need someone with enough digits to hold a pen.

I don't want to abolish government. I simply want to reduce it to the size where I can drag it into the bathroom and drown it in the bathtub.

We are trying to change the tones in the state capitals, and turn them toward bitter nastiness and partisanship.

My goal is to cut government in half in twenty-five years, to get it down to the size where we can drown it in the bathtub.

Obsessions turn people off.

We will make it so that a Democrat cannot govern as a Democrat.

This always confuses liberals, that conservatives like the military and don't like the bureaucracy. That's because the military has their guns pointed out and the bureaucracy has them pointed in.

I was an anti-communist before I was political in other ways.

The future of the Republican Party, all the different folks looking to lead the Republican Party at the national level in the future, recognize we should do immigration reform.

Being married is kind of like being a Ken-doll; you don't get to dress yourself anymore.

Heureux sont ceux qui peuvent aimer et haïr sans feinte, sans détour, sans nuance.

She wore a lot of gray-green corduroy. She had been under the impression that it brought out her eyes, those shy stars.

I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache.

At the end of the day, give up your worries and give thanks for the journey.

Homophobia is like racism and anti-Semitism and other forms of bigotry in that it seeks to dehumanize a large group of people, to deny their humanity, their dignity and personhood.

"This is Lakshmi Singh." It's like a tadpole dying in muck. Take a drink. Wet your mouth.

Kindness Day? Kindness Day? Do you suppose if we were kind and enthusiastic for centuries uninterruptedly, that someone would create 'Nasty, Indifferent Day'?

Parents are usually more careful to bestow knowledge on their children rather than virtue, the art of speaking well rather than doing well; but their manners should be of the greatest concern.

I am a woodlander, I have sap in my veins.

We, the comics that we like, we're all, like, post-humor.