The French have a new president, the British will soon have a new P.M., and we envy them as we endure the endless wait for this small dim man to go back to Texas and resume his life.

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.

Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

Sometimes there is nothing you can do, and in those times, you must do something anyway.

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor

A writer gets to live yet another life every time she creates a new story.

Each one of us is serious individually, but together we become frivolous.

You cannot judge the value of a life by its length.

No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reverence.

One should not google oneself. My mother lets me know when I'm being followed by paparazzi.

I'm obsessed with Greek mythology. My favorite goddess is Artemis. She's strong and reminds me of Katniss, the heroine of The Hunger Games.

Normally, I'm good at first dates, 'cause that's the only date I ever have, so I know how to control it and be confident.

Excuses are the tools with which persons with no purpose in view build for themselves great monuments of nothing.

Some days I totally appreciate everything that's happening to me, and some days I feel everyone's waiting for me to mess up.

My pipe business I created from scratch; my media assets and bank I bought from the secondary market.