The Republican Party and the conservative movement cannot unify around a single proposition, and the Democrats easily do. They have total contempt for us.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

When words have vanished, when daily habits have extinguished emotional exchange, only killing silence remains and indifference takes over. ( "Words had disappeared" )

London is a riddle. Paris is an explanation.

I enjoy jokes, smiling, and making people smile. I may be a little different, but that's OK, who wants to be normal anyway?

The books I'm writing are houses that I build for myself.

Number one, one, one on wonderful WINO.

I got married before I found myself. People should find themselves before they get married.

Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us.

Calculus works by making visible the infinitesimally small.

While victims condemn change, leaders grow inspired by change.

Carbon made only wants to be unmade.