The Second Amendment is not really a right.

I don't care if you want to hunt, I don't care if you think it's your right. I say, sorry, you are not allowed to own a gun, and if you do own a gun I think you should go to prison.

Christianity is just as threatening as radical Islam in a country like America...

I just want to say something. 655,000 Iraqi civilians are dead. Who are the terrorists?

I act irrationally, I defy the odds, I engage when others would run. I look for trouble, I seek chaos, it is a burden.

Don't fear the terrorists. They're mothers and fathers.

I think there should be a law - and I know this is extreme - that no one can have a gun in the U.S. If you have a gun, you go to jail. Only the police should have guns.

I'd love to be a dead body in the emergency room and have George Clooney go, 'This one's gone!' while he puts a sheet on me.

I've been on every diet in the world. I've been on Slim-Fast. For breakfast you have a shake. For lunch, you have a shake. For dinner, you kill anyone with food on their plate.

I'm not going to let my life revolve around losing weight. I have other things to do.

I love to be able to support other women comics.

We dare not forget the power of prayer.

So in the sweltering heat of a July night, I sang a Christmas carol to a room full of fae, who had been driven out of their homelands by Christians and their cold-iron swords.

B.I.B.L.E. = Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.

Towering genius distains a beaten path.

I've never been competitive with anybody but myself.

The Israeli army had the most sophisticated weaponry and they used it against residential towers, schools and hospitals.

Baseball is a game dominated by vital ghosts; it's a fraternity, like no other we have of the active and the no longer so, the living and the dead.

Oh darkness, I feel like letting go.

My mom lived on an ashram on the early eighties. She turned me on to kundalini yoga and chanting and Transcendental Meditation. That was the first time I ever knew real peace.

One of the problems with the Internet is that a lot of times it is inaccurate.